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{Reservations} {Tickets} {Map} {Photos} {Souvaniers} {Postcards} {Design} 2003-01-02 | 9:16 p.m. Diary I have this little problem. How can.... how will I.... I can't live with anyone else. I'd have to tell him first, right? That would be only fair. Can you just imagine the conversation? Sitting in a restaurant, I attempt to break the news to my dreamboat: Pam, you and I will be even happier together. Do you agree? Is this something you want, too? Yes. Yes, but before you hang your shirts in my closet, there's something I haven't told you. See, I don't want you to be unhappy or think less of me... What could possibly make me think less of you? We've done some incredibly difficult volunteer work together and I know you're a wonderful person.. What? Do you snore loudly? Leave the toilet seat up? *snicker* Yes I snore, but that's not it. It happens at night, when I'm in bed. Alot. Really? How much alot? Way alot. *fidget* All night long. *fidget* Pretty much almost every night. I can get pretty loud, too. I can't help it, see... it makes me feel so much better if I do it. Otherwise I can't fall asleep. Ok. *GRIN* I gotta admit, I'm pleasantly suprised. Didn't know you had it in you. Oh yea, it's in me. And out of me. And in me again, and out and in and out... Whehehell!! I don't see this as a problem for us, my little passion flower!! Trust me, after we've made love, you'll be so satisfied you won't need to masterba... HUH?! GAS! GAS YOU LOOPY DUPE!! I fart all night long and it's a real problem for crissake!! Everything gives me gas! I lick a stamp, I get gassssss!! Do you want to spend the rest of your night wearing a gas mask and feeling vibrations in the bedsprings, and pretending to believe it's all the dog's fault? It's ok. Go ahead and break up with me. Here's your ring back. ... Only if I can blame Rover for the big wet spot on my side of the bed every night, too *cheezy grin* And so we'll buy a house next door to a sewage treatment plant, and move his mother into the in-law apartment and live soggily ever after.
Miss These? absence of life - 2003-07-28 |
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