{Reservations} {Tickets} {Map} {Photos} {Souvaniers} {Postcards} {Design}

2002-03-02 | 10:12 p.m.

I have a beanybaby plaid-skirted, fuzzy-haired little girl beany. My daughter saw her in the store one day, and she said it reminded her of me.

Well, of course she doesn't. Her hair stands straight up on her head, pointing solidly north. Mine doesn't do that. Much. She has blue eyes, and mine are brown. Her eyebrows are two perfectly straight lines, lending her this terribly astonished look. I am never suprised. Ever. By anything she or her younger sister can do or say in my presence.

On a really manic day, I might wrinkle my nose at you once, and that's about the extent of my range of emotion. Look at me and you will see, during any normal conversation this:

you: "oh my gawd! hon, you're fly is open!!"

me: *deadpan*

you: "Dear God, you've just spilled boiling liquid down the front of your brand new satin dress!!! Heavens!!"

me: *deadpan* *gets a tissue* *dab dab dab*

you: " For the love of all that is good and pure!!!! You've just run over the last man with living sperm, who is therefore responsible for carrying on the human race!! AAAAAKKKKKK!!!"

me: "o dear" *deadpan* *gets broom* *sweepitysweepsweep* "hey, look at this great new beanybaby doll my daugher got me"

pammie

<< | >>

Miss These?

absence of life - 2003-07-28
death cake - 2003-07-08
I won't let this age me. - 2003-07-06
Goodbye Jeffrey - 2003-06-19
Thanks but no thanks. - 2003-06-11

{Host}